Hayner and Bagley

I want to tell you more about my relationship with Jonathan Bayley whom I mentioned briefly at the end of my blog entitled "You Want Gravy with That?" Jonathan was one of a kind... and still is.

Upon reflection, it seems that I have always preferred my friends in pairs - in elementary school there was Larry Symchuk and David Raithby, in grade 5 there was Kenny Whitaker and Bobby Stevenson, in junior high there was Paul Dicks and Claudio Riva, followed by Rick Brown and Dan Brown who remain my closest pair of friends to this day. Even as an adult in Calgary my pair of friends were Richard Perlman and Rick Green. But in grade 6 Jonathan was more than enough - like I said - he was one of a kind.

Jonathan and I met at Smythe Street School and shared a strange bond in that I was always trying to avoid trouble while Jonathan was always looking for more. We also shared a love of music, since at the time I was learning to play the baritone for the Salvation Army and he was studying the violin. A natural pairing you would have to agree. But our "practice sessions" usually degraded into recording racing car noises on his father's tape recorder and playing them loud out the upstairs window from their house on Brunswick Street.

Jonathan had a nice family - his sister who mostly avoided us and his professional parents who were probably a little concerned about our lack of serious musical ambition. But they were lovely people and I was flattered when Mrs. Bayley (whom I am very fond of) once commented favorably on my singing voice after she heard my version of Wayne Newton's "Apple Blossom Time" on the aforementioned tape recorder.

Jonathan and I spent a lot of time together and his father Robin, a serious music teacher, was quite generous in taking us for long, slow drives in his vintage Rambler which I now suspect were intended mainly to keep Jonathan out of trouble. He even took us bowling (once) to keep us busy but how was he to know Jonathan would put a roll of caps in the ball return. We may have been the only 12 year olds ever kicked out of the KP Bowling Lanes for the reckless endangerment of innocent bowlers. Robin was not amused.

One of our favorite things to do was to "dine out" - which meant going to The Seven Seas restaurant on Queen Street and pretending to be important and mysterious out-of-towners. I imagine our dark sunglasses and sophisticated talk of our private plane waiting at the airport impressed many a waitress. Eventually Jonathan and I drifted apart because, to be honest, he was just too dangerous to hang out with or walk to school with. You see, Jonathan had no fear of anyone; wore his mouth on his sleeve, so to speak and he was what you might call a bully baiter. There was nothing he liked better than to point out how greasy some passing delinquent's hair was or how pointy his boots or sharp his switchblade - I am exaggerating for effect but I think you get the idea. We would remain friends but at a safe distance.

Many years later after moving to Edmonton, Alberta I was crossing a downtown street when I literally ran into Jonathan and we got back together for a while and it was like old times. I still see him when he is in town to visit his mother. He is now a well respected music professor and flautist so I guess after switching instruments he settled down after all - at least musically.

But why the title "Hayner and Bagley" you ask and well you may. A simple explanation is usually the best and the simple reason is that is what our shop teacher chose to call us - likely due to our poor writing and his poor reading. Anyway - that is the way he always referred to us during roll call despite our repeated corrections. He was a cantankerous old guy and I think he continued to do it just to rattle our chains. Maybe he just liked the sound of it... 'Hayner and Bagley - quiet!' or 'Clean up time - Hayner and Bagley - get the brooms' and so on. Actually, I like the sound of it too - it would have been a great name for our musical duo on baritone and violin. Wouldn't Robin have been proud?